Bit of a wild day today! Laura was assaulted and I turned into a forensic specialist! All those hours spent watching CSI and crime movies paid off! Let me start with my morning…
Well… I didn’t really see it haha. I slept most of it 😛 “And it was gooooood“. That’s biblical! Why does God say “And He saw that it was good” ??? Why didn’t he say “great” or “brilliant” or something with a little more emphasis. Good just sounds “blah“. A bit like when you say “Do I look ok?” and the person says “yea, it’s nice“. If someone tells me something is nice I automatically ask “what’s wrong with it?” If there wasn’t anything wrong with my outfit and it was amazing then the person would be like “woooaaaaahhhh awesome!!!” Ok, getting off track.
So yea, awesome sleep in. Then I talked on facebook to people; watched a movie… A Walk to Remember 😛 ; then went into town with Laura once she got in from school. What was supposed to be a quick trip to one of the shops turned into a bit of a date as we ended up having dinner at McDonald’s haha. On our way home we were having a bit of a giggle and I was looking at Laura (who was on my right) as I was talking to her. All of a sudden a milk bottle came flying from my left and hit her fully in the face. I was like “what the hell did someone just throw that at you?” and quickly turned around to see who threw it. Unfortunately the car with the person into was now too far away for me to the get the number plate but we did get a description. Poor Laura wasn’t injured but just quite shocked as she explained to me the guy in the passenger seat looked at her and aimed the bottle at her.
We were 5 minutes from home so we quickly went home and told mum what happened. Mum decided to report it to the police and whilst she was on the phone Laura and I decided we should have got the bottle for finger prints. So out came my forensic skills, I got an unused plastic sandwich bag and something to pick up the bottle without me touching it. We should have grabbed the bottle at the time… never mind.
Strangely enough the milk bottle disappeared from the “scene of the crime“. Laura and I looked up and down for it but couldn’t find it. After a little prayer to God to ask him to help us find it I decided to peered into the nearest bin… and there was a milk bottle. Right on top of everything, last thing to be put into the bin, exactly the same size, shape, colour etc. What were the chances? And it wasn’t a very busy street for that time of day. I couldn’t reach it using the instrument to pick it up so I looked at Laura and said, “I’m only doing this cos I love you“… then leaned in and put my whole arm in to get it. Now, it wasn’t a busy street… but busy enough so that everyone who saw would think “what a tramp!!!!”
Why was the bottle removed? I’m not sure… and it might not be the same bottle. There is that possibility. But it went missing off the street in a matter of 20 minutes which is quite odd; and so one way or another it was picked up. Was it a tree hugger cleaning the street? Did the idiots realise how stupid they were to throw thing at people and come back to get it because they’re finger prints were on there? Who knows. But it did provide a bit of drama for us this evening haha. As Laura said, she wasn’t hurt… but if someone is dumb enough to deliberately throw something at someone’s face, then for goodness sakes what else are they dumb enough to do? Sure the police have a lot to do… maybe not in Carlisle haha… but who does that?! The last thing we want is for someone to do something worse for another when we could possibly do something to sort it out now.
Anyways… that was my adventure for the day 🙂
… The dream of Belgium Adventures have been dashed hahahah. GUTTED. I’m now flying on the 10th. Good news, if I fail my drivers test I might be able to do it before flying to Belgium… bad news, Laura and I are still working out our girlie holiday 😛
Guess what, a series of disasters has turned out to have catastrophically created the greatest plan ever. Ok, I’m exaggerating but here’s what happened.
Two days ago I wrote about how Laura and I wanted to go away together somewhere fun, somewhere warm, and somewhere other than England. And as I explained money was a factor and so where a few other little random things. Anyways, last night dad told me he accidentally booked a flight to Belgium for me two days earlier than when I was supposed to go. That wouldn’t have been too big an issue, however I get back from Germany late on the 6th; am speaking at a church in London on the 7th, and flying out again on the 9th. So what the dilemma? Well, the plan was to fly on the 11th so I can book a second driving test if I fail the first between the 8th and the 10th… preferably the 10th. I could maybe do it later when I get back from Belgium and Holland however we’re getting awfully close to when I leave for Australia.
So there I am, scratching my head wondering what to do about the plane ticket and wondering what I should do on my own in Belgium for two days. I would have a place to stay but the “town” is tiny! Bored! Very not worth it when you might need to do a driving test. As I was sharing this with a friend we got onto the subject of needing an adventure together before I go to Australia, and somehow we incorporated the proposed adventure into my Belgium dilemma which turn into the following.
We’d go out partying all night, get lost, get kidnapped, get forced to work in a Belgium Waffle Factory where no one speaks English, try to draw attention to us else how by eating all the waffles… which we just got into even more trouble for, and somehow we later get recused… which hasn’t been discussed yet. But my suggestion would be to be rescued by the mafia after we flood the factory with chocolate and try to sail out the top window in a rubbish bin. Apparently the mafia just happened to be watching the Belgium Waffle Factory… and of course for no apparent reason.
More realistically, Laura this morning suggested she come with me to Belgium a few days early and we have our “girls holiday” in Brussels. Laura, you are a genius. As for the driving test, well… we will just have to keep praying I pass the first time. And if I don’t, then we’ll have to pray I get a date before Australia and pass in time. I heard a really awesome story yesterday from Sara who renewed her Swiss documents two weeks before she was to fly out of Brazil. She was going to England and with her Swiss passport she didn’t need all the visas that her Brazilian one would need. The authorities said there was no way her passport/documents would be ready in time. But she kept calling them and at the very last moment on her way to the airport she discovered her Swiss documents were ready. Soooo… God does swoop in at the 11th hour. So, I have no reason to doubt I won’t pass my drivers test in time. Which by the way… I’m very encouraged with my driving as I can do all my maneuvers without hitting the pavement. YES! Now all I need to do is keep practicing and I’ll be fine 🙂
Got to see Sam Harper and hang out with Sara Macy yesterday. So cool having her around in England. Sometimes I do love Carlisle. I know… I said it. But all the time there’s so many people passing through from the ships. Danielle and Sam get here soon too. YEY!
Time for another update!
I’ve had a couple of driving lessons this week, and thankfully I’m getting the hang of parking into a bay. The reason why I’ve been struggling so much is for the test you need to do it in one motion. If you need to pull forward and straighten up before reversing back in… that’s a minor. However most people would do the later rather than one motion. So I’ve been trying to work out, if you’re reversing into a bay from the left… at what point do you start turning the wheel. I’m the kinda person who needs to understand the theory of something in order to put it to practice or understand it in practice. Trial and error just doesn’t work for me haha. Mum has finally told me something that works. However I need to keep practising it. Reversing into a bay from the right is a lot easier because you can just see the line. Reversing around a corner is the easiest at the moment. Three point turns are also fine but if you know English roads…. you’ll understand why I really hope they either don’t ask me at all to do it or they chose a wide road. In many places around here the roads are so narrow a turn in the road can easy be a 5 point turn or even a 7 point turn… and the pressure to not hit the curb, which would be an automatic fail… is just too high haha. I’m feeling a bit better now about my test though. I moved it from today to another date in two weeks time. It just gives me a little longer. Will keep you posted 🙂
I finally finished the loft… again. You’re right if you thought I already did the loft. I did. However, the list I made of everything that is up there was deleted off my computer when my computer was rewritten. So I had to go back up there and redo the list. The reason why I did the list was because (i) if I never need to ship stuff, it’s good to have a list of what was in the box; and (ii) if I need anything whilst I’m away then I can direct mum or dad to its exact location 😛 I’m very helpful aren’t I 😛 Thankfully unlike last time it didn’t take at all long to do. I think I spread it out over 4 days, whereas last time it took several weeks. But that was because I was sorting through LOADS of boxes throwing stuff away, selling other stuff and reboxing what I wanted. Oh and finding boxes. Always a mission! 😛
My room is being packed down. Today I should have the last of it done. Oh that just reminded me. I need more boxes. You’re right again if you’re thinking “but you’re not going for another 2 months.” However is I look at my diary at the moment then out of 65 days (now until the 27th of August), I’m unavailable for 41 of those days…. OH MY LIFE I’M UNAVALIBLE FOR 41 DAYS?! I knew I didn’t have very long to do everything I need to do…. but I didn’t realise it was only 14 days?! Two weeks!! Oh my worddddddd. What do I mean by unavailable? Well, I have a wedding, two camps, some events, visiting some friends, and I’ve “booked out” my last week home so I can be free to do stuff with the family and friends etc. So really in that sence my “unavailability” is actually I’m available hahahahaha.
Laura and I really want to do something together before I leave. We were hoping to go away for a couple of days however it’s not quite coming to plan as it all costs money. She has money and I don’t haha. Maybe I should tell her I’m her date 😛 Since we are going to be over in Europe for camp we were thinking about doing something over there… We kinda was hoping for some sun and maybe a beach if we were lucky… but definitely sun. We could do something in England but, again, it’s quite expensive. I know things don’t have to cost a lot but right now I have zero to spend on a holiday with the sis haha. I’m trying to convince her to come to Australia for two weeks 😛 There will be both sun and beaches hahaha. I’m sure we’ll think of something but if you have any ideas that would be great!! 😛
I don’t really have anything too big to share… lots of random little things happen throughout the day. But nothing too big. Hey, having said that, Laura’s been pretty sick for the past few weeks. She feels fine in her self however she’s had a very nasty mucus cough and she struggles to sleep at night as she gets quite wheezy. She’s been getting earache and headaches the past few days too. She went to the doctor but was told “antibiotics could make it worse” and wasn’t given anything. Today she’s taken the day off school. So if you could all pray. She’d be very grateful for it. And so would I… she’s all covered in germs right now 😛 No seriously, that’d be awesome 🙂
Ok, I have some potentially exciting news. I can’t really explain as of yet why or how… but I might be entitled to quite a considerable about of money. As it turns out I’ve not been receiving a payment that I had been getting for a long time. For no apparent reason it has stopped when technically and legally it shouldn’t have stopped. Quite exciting hey! Well, trying to not get excited because I have no idea what they’re going to say. However, it was very encouraging to stumble across this “mistake” and be reminded that God is good.
There are so many ways or things that God could use or do to help me make ends meet and raise money for Australia. I’m so focused on what I know and what I can’t do…. I’ve been trusting the skies to fill the ditches with water… and I’m not looking towards God. I’m not trusting that He can cause a spring of water to develop… or in this case, “make money appear“. I don’t believe in this prosperity gospel that others believe in. I don’t believe God wants us all to be rich financially. I do believe, and at times like now forget that I believe, God is faithful. He knows us humans are “restricted” by money and yet, He somehow still provides every single time. Either money comes in or He finds away to provide what you need without the use of money.
What I mean by He makes money appear… is sometimes money comes your way at just the right time. And I chose to think that is God in the mist of it all. For example, I once wanted to go home from university for a week. And I didn’t have the money. But exactly when I needed it to, I got a cheque in the post saying I paid too much for a water bill 6 months earlier and they were refunding me. Why didn’t I get that cheque at any other point during those 6 months? Maybe it was just coincidence… but, then again it could have been God 🙂
So yes… whilst I would be absolutely hopping with joy and excitement if I got this money… I think it’s yet another reminder that God promised to look after me, and He will. Having said that… I’m human and I’d still really like the money as well as the reminder!!! 😛 So, if I may somewhat cheekily ask, I’d be really grateful if you could please pray about this!! Please pray that if I really was legally entitled to this money all along that I would get it, but also that I wont be too sad if I don’t get it!! 😛 Thanks!! 😀
Today was a good day. It was just one of those days that you think…”uh, this was interesting.” So, it all started with a ridiculous lie in. I managed to roll outta bed around 11am…ARGH?! I seriously can’t remember the last time I did that.I’m sure it wasn’t more than a couple of months but in young person’s terms that’s just AMAZING 😛 Mum and I then headed into town to meet up with Laura… not before an awesome breakfast. A biscuit. You know, if I start my days like that I just KNOW the rest of the day is going to be epically unhealthy 😛 More proof that I’m still “a kid“.
I learnt something today that made me decide I’m a bit dumb sometimes…. a bit like I only worked out this year what “yellow snow” was and why people say “don’t eat yellow snow.” It’s cos it’s pee right?! I have no idea how or why but it suddenly occurred to me that this was what it was…. you’re gonna tell me I’m wrong aren’t you?
Anyways, back on track, Laura and I were hunting for a father’s day gift and we thought of one thing but couldn’t find what we wanted. This was like a week ago. But today, quite randomly we literally stumbled on the item in a shop! We couldn’t believe it because I’ve never been to that section of the shop before, we stopped to look at one thing, moved our eyes further along the shelf and it was right there!
Driving was ok today… still learning, still getting there. But a family friend offered to help take me driving which is awesome!!! I do have people to help me already but it’s all very dependant on their schedule. So to have another person to help is just great! Even if it’s just for a little bit! Sooo thankful! this evening I when to a BBQ. It rained a little… But what’s a BBQ in England without rain right?! 😛 Anyways it was at the BBQ where I was given my first car!!!!!!!!! A BMW Z3!!!! I’ve ALWAYS said my first car will be a convertible and it was literally handed right to me! 😛 Hhahahah, it came with the comment that I was to put it in my car when I pass my test 😛 Also tonight, we watched “A Time To Kill“. It’s the movie version of John Grisham’s novel. It was intense but pretty wow. I’d recommend it!
Tomorrow we’re celebrating father’s day a little earlier and I’m just gonna be going through my to do list 🙂 Fun times. Thanks for your thoughts and prayers everyone. It was nice to have a full positive day today 🙂
Can’t believe it was only two days ago that I last wrote on here. It feels like so much longer.
Well, as always it feels like it’s been a topsy turvy 48 hours. Lots of tears over my driving haha. Do you know, I started my morning by crying…now that’s disturbing! LOL! I actually have to laugh at this because this isn’t like me to get upset over something, and especially not something like this. After a lot of talking and some “investigation” I’ve decided to change the date of my test. The big dilemma prior to this evening regarding this was I didn’t feel ready to take it, but knew if I rescheduled then the next avaliable date would be the 24th of July and should I fail the first time I wouldn’t have enough time before Australia to do it again. Well what do you know, maybe God met me in the middle because a date between now and the 24th of July has come up. So I took it. This now means I have an additional 18 days to practice AND I am likely to have time to do it again before Australia should I need to.
I know everyone has confidence issues with their driving. But I don’t feel confident because I still can’t do some of my manouvers. I literally, at this moment in time, can’t get the car bang in the middle of the two white lines when reversing into a parking bay. I’m always far close to one or the other edge. It’s not that I think I can’t do somethings, I KNOW I still can’t do somethings. Anyways… that’s taken a bit of pressure off his whole moving it to another date that’s closer than the 24th of July but still gives me another 2 weeks.
Today I realised something. I finally understand why I’m feeling so stressed at the moment. It’s because alot of stuff is up in the air. You’d think that would be SO obvious to me. But it wasn’t. I realised today that I need to make decisions. And today, thankfully, I feel like God has brought me to a day where decisions can be made. Simply because as of today I now have the information I didn’t have before. What a relief! I now know what I’m doing in between Teenstreet and MTO. I now know if and when I’m going down to Birmingham and Leicester to say goodbye to some of my closest friends.
I also know I have to make some sacrifices in some places, and I feel ok about that… it’s the not knowing which sacfricies need to be made and all the stumbling blindly forward that’s been hard. Like for example, Laura wants to go away with me before I leave for Australia. And I keep saying to her, “Well, until I’ve done my driving test I won’t know whether or not I’m coming back to England between Teenstreet and MTO, and if I am coming back then we need to go something in England and not Europe, but if I don’t come back to England and we do something in Europe then we ned to think where we’re going and how much money we need etc”… Since there’s many things at the moment that are like this it’s been hard. But like I said, I know so much more now and can start putting it all into a plan 🙂 God is good and prayer works!
Cool stuff from today: Drove around for 2 hours. Reservsing around corners and 3 point turn is good. Was invited to ARC for a missions focused service in August and think I’m speaking. Eak!!! Have no idea if it’s a short 3 minute thing or a bit longer or what… actually when I asked Pastor Peter he said I was singing!! ARGHHHHH! Forget THAT! But that’s quite exciting and a privledge! And don’t worry I’ll get God to give me happy, inspiring and motivating words rather than this ol’ mumble jumble on my blog these days 😛 I managed to write another letter… better than nothing. I’m suppose to be writing hand written letters to people at the moment. It’s getting there! Not too many more to do I don’t think. My room is still being packed down…oops. I think I moved one item today. Honestly, it’s like one of those army assult course things in my room! 😛 Jump here, dive there… You know I kinda have to throw myself onto the bed and roll side ways to miss boxes when I’m trying to walk down the length of the room hahahah. It doesn’t work when the cat is lying on my bed. Better than nothing right?
Now… last year, the world was asked to participate in making a film. A film about life in a day on Earth. Thousands of people submitted thousands of hours of footage from over 190 countries. This has been edited and made into a movie. A movie filmed by US, by YOU… Here’s the trailor. The movie comes out this year. I think it looks pretty good!
Time to update you all again…I actually have quite a bit to share but lets start with my mock driving test.
Surprisingly, I was actually nervous. I didn’t think I would be but I was. It started off pretty good… as these things usually do… but then I did some massively stupid things and managed to get quite a few majors. All of them I thought to myself “Akila, all those mistakes were not worth the fail. If you’re going to fail then at least get a major in something massive. NOT for parking too far away from the kerb towards the end of your test!”
I was really glad I did the test… as I should be feeling pleased that all my mistakes are very easily correctable. But with so many majors I’m like “shit, this is so not gonna happen.” As in, pass my test. Sure I need to just keep practicing. And sure I gotta be pleased with what I can do well, which according to the instructor is independent driving, driving off from being parked and some other stuff that I can’t remember. But “majors, majors, majors you’re going to fail” is floating around my brain right now. Incase you’re wondering, I’m allowed 15 minors and NO majors.
This afternoon I’ve been wondering to myself, why am I even doing this? I don’t even like driving and when I’m in Australia I wont even have a car. So why why why am I putting all this pressure on myself? I’m not really sure what to think right now. If I say “Screw it, if I pass I pass and if I don’t then oh well never mind” then that might work cos without the pressure I might do better… but that could backfire and I’d do even worse because I “won’t care“. *Sighs*… I really need everyone to pray. I don’t wanna pass if I’m not yet a safe driver. But I do wanna be a safe enough driver to pass my test so I can just get my license and then never ever drive again haha. No seriously, I wanna be a safe driver and pass my test.
I’m fast losing motivation at the moment with stuff, not just driving, a few things. And these things are just such hard work… and I know that’s life and I should just suck it up… I’m just feeling a little like “everything is such a massive effort and for what?” Right now the end results just don’t seem to be worth it. But at the same time I also know God has the potential to make the end results of all these things so much more than what we ever thought. And so we all just gotta keep pushing forward right?
I’ve learnt something about myself though. I hate it when things become my life. If I’m eating, sleeping, breathing one core topic then I lack energy to concentrate on other things. Like if I being consumed by university work, or driving, or a key relationship… I think I’m all or nothing and if I’m all then nothing else has as much drive behind it. Like now… my brain cells are literally being used up on driving, even when I sleep I dream about driving, and even though I have so much Australia related stuff to do I just cannot find the energy to work on that after driving for 2 hours and thinking about it for 7 hours. Maybe I need to mediate… that’s about clearing the mind right? Well we all know how that’s going to go… I’ll end up eating something hahahahahah.
Ok, onto other more exciting stuff… I start my work placement on Wednesday, I had a friend come visit this weekend, and funny enough, she’s moving to Australia the same time I am. I’ve known her for 18 years and we’ve been pretty close through out this time. In fact she’s pretty much apart of the family haha. And what are the chances, she’s going to Sydney and I’m going to Brisbane. Close enough to see each other with needing to sell our body parts for cash like that dude selling his kidney for an Ipad… having said that I wonder how much I could get for my appendix? They’re a bit useless anyways right? 😛
I’ve forgotten what else I was gonna say… hmmm… oh no I remember! I spoke to the assistant pastor and his wife yesterday and they were telling me about my room being ready for me when I get there! Eak, exciting! 😀 Ok, well as part of my just cracking on and pushing forward I’m gonna finish off packing up my room. With Friends in the background… surprise surprise! 😛
I have some REALLY exciting news to share with you. As you may already know, at the end of August I am moving to Brisbane (Australia) to work with my church, “River of Life“, for a year. Since this job will be unpaid and voluntary I’ve been trying to find ways to raise finances before I go. However, that’s been quite a mission since God hasn’t answered my prayer for a job in England in the meantime.
So, why did I chose to go even though I don’t have a job to fund this? I know… what a crazy decision and who does that?! Well, 8 months ago I was in Australia and I really felt God was leading me to come back and work with my church there. Since then challenging circumstances have come up but in the midst of it I still felt God leading me to return. So, I decided to take the leap of faith and go with it.
With what savings I did have I spent on buying plane tickets and insurance for the year. Consequently my bank balance pretty much hit “zero“. Without a job I’ve been challenged to trust God for the rest of the finances. So far there have been two key “fund raising projects“. One being the sale of many of my personal possessions and the second being the partnering with others financially and spiritually. Whilst there has been an increase in my “Australia Fund” as a result of these two projects, I still need to raise quite a bit more financially.
God’s faithful. As of yesterday, here’s my third project that I would LOVE for you to get involved in. A very kind couple from church have given me a five-star holiday in one of their five-star holiday cottages to auction. This auction provides you with an incredibly lovely way to support my work in Australia and have an awesome holiday….
Garth cottage is self catered and located in Castle Carrock (Cumbria). Since it’s located in the Lake District it has THE most amazing views of Carlisle, Scotland, the Solway Firth. The sunsets are INCREDIBLE also. The cottage sleeps up to four people in two bedrooms, one double and one twin. It has free wifi and free access to a luxury gym/pool in a nearby village. The owners do lots of lovely lovely touches for their guests and really make these holiday absolutely unforgettable. There are lots of things to do outside such as awesome walks up on the fells, the resvoir at the foot of the hill or a nearby tarn. The scenery and wildlife is just awesome. Quite a few cute villages within walking distance and Carlisle and Scotland are a short drive away. Castle Carrock itself is a mile walk with an excellent restaurant/pub is you want to eat out close by.
What is being auctioned – A holiday at Garth Cottage (worth £385).
STARTING BID IS £50!!!!!!!
YOU CHOSE the dates (subject to avalablity); and whether you would like to go for 3 nights or 4 nights (Friday-Monday OR Monday-Friday).
Auction Ends – 11.59pm Saturday 9th of July 2011. The highest bidder shall be contacted the next day.
To bid – Please contact either myself, mum or dad with your bid. You can do this via email or Facebook message. If you do not have these details please contact me via this blog.
Additional information – For all the information you could possibly need regarding the cottage itself including availability please check out the website http://www.tottergill.co.uk/cottages/garth-cottage.
PLEASE GET IN TOUCH WITH US RATHER THAN THE OWNERS IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS! 😀
Long awaited update! I know! I’m sorry! Things are a little crazy at the moment… which is great but busy too haha. Okies here we go…
Monday – I had a doctor’s appointment about my hair. Thankfully she took me seriously. For the past 5 months it’s been falling out very badly and so she booked me in to get blood tests. I can’t really remember too much of Monday… I know I started packing down my room also. Oh I remember! I went for a meeting regarding my new work placement. I’ll be working with a benefits consultant for 6 weeks. Pretty excited as he’s super specialised, does court cases all over the country and does a lot with and for the House of Lords! So cool!
Tuesday – I had a driving lesson. Driving is going GREAT! Thank you thank you thank you sooooooooooo much for your prayers! PLEASE keep them up! There has been a massive improvement in my driving and my driving instructor went from telling me I wasn’t ready to be mock tested to telling me he feels I’m ready in a matter of a week! YES! What an encouragement!
Wednesday – We went over to Newcastle for the day since we had to pic up dad late afternoon. I was able to drive all the way there and back. Approx 120 miles, 2 hours 30 min of driving, varied speeds from 20mph – 70 mph (32km – 113km), roundabouts, varied road types… not bad not bad! Plus I didn’t crash! YEY!
Thursday – Had my blood tests, spent the afternoon with Laura, and went out for driver with mum/dad and family friends.
Friday (today) – Had a major lazy day. Watched two movies before 2pm. Oops. Mike Hey is with us at the moment and tomorrow Leah comes over for the evening. YEY! Sooooo excited!
It doesn’t sound busy does it? But in between these random events I’ve either been up in the loft, packing up my room, writing letters, sorting random stuff out… It’s so crazy, I get into bed each night and think “Crap!!!!! I didn’t do x, y,z!!” 😦 I have a longgggg list of things I’m slowly working my way through. Hopefully I’ll get there sooner than later! 😛
Australia news. Well, my room is already set up in Australia apparently haha. EXCITED! I’m skyping with the assistant pastor in a few days so hopefully I’ll have more crack to share with you all 🙂 Fund raising is going really great. SO encouraged by the support of others. I’m feeling a little guilty because I have about 60 letters I’m trying to hand write and send in the post… I’ve done about half of them but still have quite a few to do. Some of them are thank yous and they’re taking a little longer than planned. I think tomorrow I’ll just get on and do the rest of them… Leah will just have to sleep in amongst the mess in my room 😛 But for the latest exciting news I’ll write a separate post.
Spend all your time waiting for that second chance
For the break that will make it ok
There’s always some reason to feel not good enough
And it’s hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction oh beautiful release
Memories seep from my veins
They may be empty and weightless and maybe
I’ll find some peace tonight…
Oh my word yesterday was drama filled. The normal part of my day involved packing up my room and making room in the loft. I hit my head on the way up the ladder but didn’t do any more damage… yes! The rest of my day however…
So, drama one, a book of mine got sold on Amazon, I got £2 something for it and postage cost me £3 something. What a joke. I effectively paid the person to take this book from me. Drama two, I ended up illegally driving on the motorway. Oops. Mum gave the worst directions and even though I was clear in my mind what I need to do her freaking out totally confused me. I didn’t mind… I thought it was pretty funny. However I have no idea what the consequences would have been had the police caught me. Let me play out the scene for you… Remember watching “Transformers” ? The first one? And remember the scene between Glen and Maggie in the police station and the conversation goes like this…
Glen: Okay, Maggie, look. Let me break it down to you, how it’s gonna happen. They gonna come through that door, they’re gonna play good cop, bad cop. Don’t fall for that, alright?
[Maggie rubs her head]
Glen: That’s why I ate their food. See, they put the plate of donuts out here to test your guilt. If you don’t touch it, you’re guilty!
[exhibits empty plate]
Glen: I ate the whole plate. The WHOLE plate. So, me and you: they walk through that door, you don’t say nothing.
[Agents enter the room, and Glen is calm up to the point an agent places his briefcase on the table… ]
Glen: [pointing to Maggie] It was her! She did it! She did it! She’s the one you want!
Glen: Don’t talk to me! Don’t talk to me criminal!
Glen: Woah, sugar rush.
I’m Glen, mum’s Maggie… and if the cops come, that’s EXACTLY how the situation is gonna play out. But in my mind for some reason I look like Justin Lowe… Really very random!
Drama three, I was treated to a trip to the cinema to watch “Pirates of the Caribbean 4“. That wasn’t the drama, but when Laura and I passed the shopping mall on our way the whole place had alarms going off and a very loud automated messaged telling everyone to evacuate the building. Since there was no one turning it off we wondered whether it was a real fire somewhere and therefore decided to “do the right thing” and call 999. So we did and apparently the fire service was already there. So we weren’t total losers after all 😛 I’ve been working before when the alarms went off in the shopping mall but actually I’ve never seen all the alarms flashing in every shop before… and with it being after hours and no one around it was kinda spooky.
Drama four… Laura refused to by me Skittles when we were at the cinema. BUT, Pirates of the Caribbean 4 is worth the watch. It was pretty funny. Not as good as the first but loads better than the second or third. Laura fell in love with the missionary in the movie and both she and I have decided we wanna be mermaids. We’ve decided they’re cool. Soul drowning aside. But since there was a bit of uncertainty as to whether the missionary, Phillip, survives when Syrena pulls him into the water… I did some research on the movie and here’s what my Facebook conversation looked like between Louisa, Tessa and myself…
Akila: The missionary is alive! Syrena kissed him, and a mermaid’s kiss prevents anyone from drowning. She pulled him under to heal him. Unlike all the others who tempted sailors to “kiss them” but never actually did… He DID kissed her which is the key!! Woop woop!! He’s alive!!! 😛
Tessa: Did you look this up? 😛
Akila: I did!!! It was torturing me not knowing!!!
Tessa: Haha I see.. So what happens when they stop kissing? Because they went underwater..
Akila: Hahahahaha it doesn’t matter, the single kiss prevents him from drowning… so I guess he’s a merman now 😛 Or maybe he only needed to be underwater long enough for the waters to heal him, then she dumped him on dry land… or and then they had babies 😛 And they names one Ariel 😛 LOL
Tessa: Hahahaa getting a bit carried away are we? 😛 How do mermaids give birth anyways? Do they lay eggs?
Akila: Nooooo silly…they go on shore and be humans! 😛 😛 😛
Tessa: Yes but what if there is no shore?
Akila: They have 9 months to swim to one! sort of like when they reach the 3rd trimester like we cant fly… they cant go swimming in the deep blue!! maybe the shallow, close to the shore… but not the deep end! XD
Tessa: Haha so at the start of the 9 months do they have to be human as well?
Akila: Hmmm good point… yes, Laura says they have to do it the human way… passionately!!! XD Laura’s actually in love with the missionary hahahahaha he was “physically fit” according to her bbbhahahaha
Tessa: Hahahaha wow, go get him Laura! 😉 (Have fun battling a mermaid :P)
Louisa: YAYYY!!!! haahaa 🙂
Akila: Oooooh yea, Laura’s gonna have to fight the mermaid first…didnt think about that. could be quite entertaining to watch! 😛
Tessa: Someone should film it.
Akila: Pirates of the Caribbean 5 😛
Let’s be honest… Pirates of the Caribbean is all about Jack Sparrow. Sorry… “CAPTAIN” Jack Sparrow (Pete Q!) Jonny Depp Really made that character what it is and he’s a genius for it! Today has been a lot less eventful. Thank goodness! It’s been about packing up and packing down… my room and loft. It’s already past 8pm so I guess the rest of the evening is going to be prepping for tomorrow. Lots of running around tomorrow. *Sighs* It’s all good though. Prayer requests… money, practice driving and my doctor’s appointment either tomorrow or Tuesday for my hair. Pray they take me seriously! I’m taking my hair that’s fallen out in a bag haha… it’s pretty rank how much there is 😦 God is good though. Just gotta keep praying 🙂
I LOVE how it doesn’t get dark anymore. We’re up north far enough for it to stay “light” somewhere in the sky the whole time 🙂 A true sign of summer 😛
Today was one of those days when the alarm goes off, you hit it about a million times and get up 30 minutes later than you’re suppose to. For some reason I was so tired, must have been the dreaming. It was fairly intense haha.
20 minutes to shower, get ready and eat before my two hour driving lesson. Breakfast consisted of a small biscuit/cookie and half a glass of orange juice… big indicator for the diet of the day haha. Driving went well. My maneuvers were a great improvement from the day before and my instructor even said he was confident he’d be able to mock me soon. YES! The prep talk I gave myself yesterday must have paid off. “Akila, you’re just going to HAVE TO hack this!” The biggest failure of the day was stalling, twice, on a steep hill. I couldn’t believe it. I never have a problem with hill starts. *Sighs*…but hey over all getting better! 😀
Got home and spent 40 minutes of my 70 minutes sun tanning. It was about time! This is the first day of the year that I’ve managed to be available to sit outside! Couldn’t pass up the chance. Sun lines were created within 5 minutes… that’s how sun neglected my body was. Lunch was a soda and an ice cream. Told you my diet was gonna be epic. Then when it got to about 1.10pm I drove down to a meeting in town about my employment. Thankfully they have a work placement for me. It’s unpaid… but then again with a lack of positive leads employment wise here, I’ll take anything and hey, it’s good for the CV 🙂 One day I’ll be working for a Benefits Consultant as a PA/receptionist and another day I’ll be working with a youth centre. No sure what I’ll be doing there yet but it could literally be anything from reception work to mentoring to supervising sports activities. So hey, it’s all good and that’ll be for the next 6 weeks.
The walk home was nice, there are loads of people out in the park and on bikes. I love it when it warms up to 27 degrees C in England 😛 Finally when I got home and got out the warm sunshine I went up in the loft for an hour and a half and DIED. It’s an actual sauna up there and within minutes I was dripping with sweat. It was so gross haha. Luckily I found my fan and whilst it was warm air it was heaps better… still looked like a shiny gym fanatic when I climbed back down haha. Oh and then I had a snack… cheese dipped in raspberry jam. Told you… I have the best meals 😛
So all in all a good day 🙂 Slightly tired… but happy my driving is coming together, the work placement is gonna be good, and I managed to get some stuff done on the loft 🙂
My to do list… “Do everything on it.” Well, good news people I can now cross off my computer course! YES! Finally that’s over… 7 exams with an average of 95%. Ahhh what a relief after that nightmare degree and so much failure to know I’m not dumb after all haha. Phew!
So what’s next, well… tomorrow I have a meeting with my like “personal advisor” and we’ll be looking at how to improve my CV. One thing she wants me to do is some work experience in an Office using the stuff I’ve just learnt. Sounds good hey? I’m just going to have to try and work it around my other commitments at the moment. Primarily… driving. I hate driving. I actually hate it. What a headache haha. Nahhhh… it’s alright… I guess.
Great news I’m improving. Bad news my driving instructor doesn’t wanna mock test me yet. Having said that… he’s really super by the book which is great because I know that when he’s willing to mock test me he think I’m ready. So whilst it’s a pain it’s also good to have that confidence that when he thinks I’m ready I’ll be most likely very ready for a test that in England less than a third pass their test on the first time. He asked me if I’d do the test still if he didn’t think I was ready. I said yeah I would. Whilst I’d be out £62 which I just simply don’t have… the test would at least prep me for what to expect.
I was thinking today on the train. I’m gonna have to stop worrying about this drivers test. There is literally nothing more I can do other than what I’m doing already. Which is on average 2 hours of driving every day and this week it’s been more like 3 hours of driving each day. I can only practice as much as I can can’t I? And pray really hard that the driving examiner doesn’t black list me as a dangerous ready to cause death driver on the day of my test. Hmmm that’s pretty traumatic to just think about! Haha, don’t worry, I know it’s not a laughing matter. I’m just smiling because knowing me I’ll be so nervous I’ll just laugh myself stupid on the day. I get the giggles when I’m nervous. It’s soooooooo awkward.
Did I ever tell you the time I almost got beaten up and I couldn’t stop laughing. Yea, it was bad. Ok so I wasn’t the one that was gonna get beaten up, the guys I was with were being yelled at by a chick and her boyfriend, we were in Belfast… sorry but enough said. So I looked the other way, burst out laughing and started praying my arse off that God would prevent them from hearing me. What a way to provoke someone even more?! “Honestly I’m not laughing at you!!!” Yea right… goodbye my face as I know it 😛
Tomorrow, I have another 2 hours driving lesson… ok… here’s good news, I’m fairly alright at parallel parking…much better than reverse parking which apparently is easier and I can never do a 3 point turn without hitting the pavement when I’m with my instructor but with mum or dad I can. What is going on like?! Apparently I think too much about steering… interesting 😛 I wonder if I should let go of the steering wheel instead 😛 😛 😛 No… I like my instructor. ALOT. I’m so thankful to God that I have someone who’s such a great teacher, who’s honest and is calm with me! He’s been so generous with his time and support. If he ever reads this THANK YOU! And if his wife and kids read this THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME SO MUCH OF YOUR DAD’S/HUSBANDS TIME!
Wanna know something awful… I clipped the roundabout today…OH MY LIFE WHO DOES THAT?! After this many hours how on earth did I do something that DUMB. My response to my instructor when I did it… “Oopsie, that would have been an epic fail!” 😛 No… it’s all going good. That was a one off stupid thing today. Most mistakes I’m making are little silly things that I know I shouldn’t do much don’t think at the time, like bring the clutch up too fast. Sighs… I’ll get there. I will… be an epic driving one day. I’m fast 😛 I can go round roundabouts in 5th without crashing or stalling. Ok… not something to be proud of, but that one WAS mum’s fault. She tried changing my gears for me.
Hmmm you know what… I should have a reality tv show where I’m filmed driving! It could be quite entertaining. Hmmmm. That’s not such a bad idea. I could film people driving to show good skills and bad choices. Starting with Laura haha. Awesome 😛
Okies so then the rest of tomorrow is a meeting about jobs and work experience; and then it’s up into the loft I go!
Ok so, nothing new has happened job wise, BUT, I’m trying to not worry about it anymore and just concentrate on what I do know. Things like packing down my room! I know that wont take very long to do. It’s a one day job tops… just I need to clear out some space in the loft for it. Also, when I went through the loft before I wrote down everything I had up there… I know… I sound really anal and controlling and blah blah blah, trust me I’m not. It’s just I’m actually expecting to be in a situation where ‘m in another country and either need something I’ve boxed or be asking someone to ship me my stuff. So, at least if I have everything boxed with a list of what’s in each box… it’ll make it a lot easy for everyone. See, not so anal anymore. However, I did that… then I lost it all when my computer died and before I backed it up. So now I’m just anal and stupid haha. Sooooo I gotta go back up there and do it again. However I don’t think it’ll take very long because everything is boxed very neatly so it’s a matter of unpacking, writing it down and repacking. Dad is gonna love me 😛 At least I’ll be up in the loft and out his way. Only… I’m gonna have to get use to the head bashing, knee whacking and body bruising… this sounds like that “5, 6, 7, 8” song by Steps hahah. Remember them? Oh dear… that was a long time ago… but incase you’ve forgotten their WONDERFUL music I’ll add a youtube link to this post. Hope you picked up the sarcasm otherwise I’m now anal, stupid, and have a pathetic taste in music. Which I don’t. Lisa VB will back me up on that 😛 Oh my word, just watched the video… *cringe* !!!
Ok, so now that we’ve established that I shall do the loft first and then pack down my room… my facebook status was asking which one to do first… I suppose I better take a look at the LONG list of things I need to do in the next 58 days. Hmmm… just really can’t be bothered to do it if I’m honest. I think the thing is everything depends on the other… so if I can’t get to the office to pick up boxes… then I’m sort of twiddling my thumbs. Of course that’s not the case… it just feels like that. I still have a number of letters I need to hand write and I need to send out a document. I have the document… just need mum to feel like she’s “walked through the door” before I try stealing her lap top 😛
You know… I’ve been thinking… people either like you or they don’t right? Well, there’s been two people in my life at the moment who haven’t told me they have a problem with me at the time of the problem. They never bothered to explain or challenge me. Instead they build preconceived ideas of me that are based on wrongful interpretations and bizarre assumptions that are actually based on their own fear rather than anything to do with me. I’m not perfect, and I really hope people know I never try to be perfect. But unless someone’s willing to talk to me about a problem they have with me… it no longer becomes my problem. How can I fix something I don’t know or understand if people are not willing to talk, explain or listen. I’m strong, I do know that… and maybe I’m intimidating. But funny enough one of the two persons doesn’t know when well enough for that to be an excuse and another person should know me well enough to know that strong personality isn’t who I am at all when you scratch 1mm below the surface. So that can’t be an excuse either then. I guess I’m just a bit confused. Cos most people know I’m very caring and very sensitive. And I’ll always appreciate you for being straight with me. It’s the wishy washy business that makes me wanna literally tear my hair out. So, why do I take the behaviour of these two people so personally? Maybe it really is their problem and not mine… Maybe THIS is why my hair keeps falling out so badly, cos my head hurts thinking about it haha. Like I said, I don’t try to pretend I’m always right, but I do expect people to talk in order for me to understand them and the situation for what it is and not just from my side. *Sighs*
Mum bought up the issue of my hair yesterday. She vacuumed and collected it all up. I got angry with her when she put it on the table to show me. It felt like she was pointing an accusing finger at me “do something about your hair!!” I know something needs to be done but there’s really not a lot I can do! 😦 I know there’s something seriously not right… but we all know I’m gonna go to the doctor and the doctor’s gonna be all like “oh take some paracetamol and rest” 😦 😦 😦 That’s all they ever say! I got angry with mum because I feel absolutely beside myself about it. My hair has been dropping out so much for the past 3 months and I can’t control it. The hairdresser said it’s not to do with hair dye… and I know that too. I’ve dyed my hair for the past 10 years and it’s never done anything like it’s doing now. I can’t brush it, sleep on it or even touch it with out it falling out. It’s not snapping… it’s falling out at the roots. And whilst I have no bald spots…yet… it’s thinning out like no tomorrow. I’m really to go to the doctor because if he doesn’t take me seriously I feel like I’m gonna absolutely lose it with him. Why? Why would I lose control of all emotion like that? Well… I’m fed up. I’m fed up and so unhappy. Inside. I still feel so heavy with emotion. Like on my shoulders. And as soon as something like this happens, that is so out my control that no amount of prayer seems to be working, with pressure on all sides to “do something about my hair.” I feel like I’m going to snap. It sounds so stupid…it’s over my hair. But it’s not, it’s everything. It’s everything that’s happened that I could never control. Never prevent… never had the chance to put right.
I guess I’ll just go… and see what happens… and pray so hard that I don’t lose the plot of sanity in the mean time.