Step Into My World…

Archive for January, 2010

Rise up…


Well, it’s been a bit of an adventure the past few days. I see my Man for the first time since the 1st of October tomorrow, my passport that was stolen in May 2009 has been returend to me from Ireland in a simple brown evelope… no letter… nothing for me to trace it. Whatta shame I had to spend £100 replacing it.

My sister’s friends brother made this video and I loved it so much I asked him to put it on youtube. He’s got skill! Whatta powerful message too.

A Dream…


I have a dream… it isn’t as cool as Martin Luther, but when I get to heaven, I’m gonna find my brother and give him a big hug.

A Friend sent me a sweet verse today, it made them think of Mike.

Isaiah 57: 1-2

 The righteous perish… devout men are taken away, and no one understands, that the righteous are taken away to be spared from evil. Those who walk uprightly enter into peace; they find rest as they lie in death.

More than Life…

This is my favourite song at the moment. If I could chose one
song to sum up my life at the moment, it would be this one.
Stand by everything You said
Stand by the promises we made
Let go of everything I've done
I'll run into Your open arms
And all I know

Is I love You more than life
Oh I love You more than life

Fall back on everything You've done
Fall back on everlasting arms
When all the world is swept away
You are all the things I need
You're the air I breathe

Oh I love You more than life
Oh I love You more than life
Oh I love You more than life
Oh I love You more than life

Because You've been so good
You've been so good
Oh Lord, Oh Lord
You said You would be there for me
You told me You would never leave
And I Love You
Oh Jesus You are so faithful, so faithful
And I Love You
Oh Yes I Do
Oh Jesus
I love You so much

Oh Jesus
How can it be
You were the one on the cross
Lifted for all our shame?
How can it be
The scars in Your hands are for me?
You are the King of all

Oh I love You more than life
Oh I love You more than life
Oh I love You more than life
Oh I love You more than life…

He would of been vs He is…

Hey Everyone!

Today would have been Mike’s 19th birthday, and Dad and I went up to the cemetery this morning before heading into town to pick up a birthday card which read this,

“Just for you Brother on your Birthday,
We shared a very happy Childhood that cannot be denied,
yet did not alway show the Love and Respect we felt inside,
We shared our many Hopes and Dreams nd lots of Secrets too,
and all these other special Memories have tied me close to you,
and now it’s your Birthday you’re wished the very Best,
For its a most important day that Stands out from the rest,
May it bring you all the Joyful things you have in mind,
for as a Brother, you are one of a Special Kind.”

Dad and I were talking this morning, that for us, there’s nothing morbid, desperate, or living in the past by going a visiting Mike’s grave. But a total reminder of WHO God is and the POWER of Jesus Christ. Visiting Mike’s grave is such an incredible way to reflect on my life.

Today was never going to be about the age Mike would of turned, but a day to thank God for the day Mike was born and entered my life. What an awesome gift He gave me. A baby brother, a baby who turned into a walking and talking Man that I was able to share so many memories with… and none of which can be robbed.

 God knew the journey Mikes life would take… but what an amazing life Mike had. I am so thankful that Mike is in the presence of God. Does it make it any less harder or less painful, No. I miss him so much. But he is free… that was one of Mikes favourite songs actually… he did a little video of him dancing to it!!! “I am free to run, I am free to dance, I am free to Live for You”.

Anyways, just a short note of thankfulness to share with you all. I know from the stories you’ve share you had some pretty sweet memories of Mike too, God is so good 🙂

Mike as a Baby

Mike as a Baby

Plodding Along…


Man it’s really hard to keep on top of this blog these days. Every day I’m working on writing my essays for university and the essays themselves just seem to get longer with slower progress being made as each day goes by. I can’t wait for this to be over!

It’s Fitzy’s last night on the ship tonight and it will be less than 13 days now until I see him again. The first time since the 1st of October! It will have been 17 weeks and 1 day… or a total of 120 days. I’m so excited!

If I could ask anything from you, I really need all the prayer I can get on completing these essays. Yes I’m in the final year, yes I’m close to the end… but I am still so so so far away from the finish line. Just a run down on what is happening…

* I’m currently working on one essay which I have about 1/3 left to do.

* I have to complete my dissertation which is 10,000 words long

* I have to complete a 4 month placement

* During that time I have to complete a 15,000 word placement portfolio

* I also have a 3000 word law essay to do during placement too

* Once all that is over… which it all has to be done by August… I have an 8 module computer course to do before graduation. Realistically, I wont get that done before November and will have to wait til the summer 2011 to officially graduate.

*There are issues to be sorting in regards to placement, the family life, the future….

I know I’m far from being the one with all the issues… but in terms of university oh my goodness… if anyone can pray or has any encouragement or motivation to share, PLEASE, send it to me! 🙂

Sweet Sixteen!


Between the partying, the essay writing, and the sleeping… it’s been a little hard keeping up with this blog!

Laura finally turned 16 on Friday, and we had a surprise party for her. Somehow, don’t ask me how, but we managed to keep it a secret from her for over 3 weeks! What a shock she got when she walked into the living room and her friends all started singing happy birthday to her!

With a mixture of decorating the house, getting dressed up, eating the biggest Chinese Food feast, playing poker, drinking virgin Pina Coladas, playing Tension, and eating ice cream birthday cake… we sure did have an awesome time.

But I think it’s safe to say the two highlights were 1. the pregnancy test and Laura’s shock confession, and 2. rolling around in the snow outside at 2am.

Sweet Sixteenth Birthdays use to be celebrating being a virgin, and the girls thought it would be funny to give Laura a pregnancy test as a joke. So off she went and did it and off course everyone seized the moment and turned it into a total laugh. When it came to telling us all the result Laura said… ” The answer is….I don’t know how to read it!!!” Talk about a funny moment! Oh, and FYI (for your information), she’s not pregnant.

As for the snow… well, it reached well below zero (the past few days especially), and when it started snowing the girls all went outside and played in it. We live on a very busy street but at 2am there wasnt a single soul beside us, other than a car/van going by every few minutes. On that note, every time another car went by the girls stood by the side of the road and did something really random like the YMCA or the Mexican Wave. I think the scariest thing they did though, would have been when all 8 of them lined up and just stood there hiding their faces!

Anyways, it was a good time! 😀 …Well done Laura for reaching your 16th!

Laura's Surprise Sixteenth!

Laura's Surprise Sixteenth!

Chinese Feast!

Chinese Feast!

Pina Coladas!

Pina Coladas!

The Pregnancy Test!

The Pregnancy Test!

Playing in the Snow!

Playing in the Snow!



Last night 3 inches of snow fell and the world in the North East of England came to a stand still. What a riot. They get feet of snow in America, Canada, Sweden… and we get a few inches and all the school close and some people couldn’t get to work… too bad the other people still had to go to work haha. It has to be said… it’s flippen freezing though!

23 day til I see my Man!



I’ve been thinking a lot recently, about why is it so hard when someone dies? Why is it that it is so painful?

If someone said they were moving, and the chances of you seeing them again were zero… the “morning” process isn’t as painful in many ways as someone dying… you can argue with me that here on Earth even if someone moved away and you never saw them again then you can always communicate with them via phone, skype, msn, facebook… but as christians we know we’ll see those who are also christians one day… so still, why is it so painful?

Maybe it comes down to separation. I believe the very essence of our being is to do with love and relationships. Isnt that why God created humans in the first place? When someone leaves and our relationship is broken… well, it’s an injury that attacks the very centre of every DNA cell within us.

I think many people are afraid of being alone, of being forgotten. Death isn’t something that is a scary thing to me. But being forgotten is. No longer playing apart in someones life. But then for those who are left behind, well, they’re left with someone missing in to share life with. it’s impossible to live life alone.



Ah, I know its been over a week since I last wrote, but to be honest, I don’t have all that much to say at the moment. So here’s a little update…

University – Well, I’ve trying to do a little bit each day with writing my essays… I’m slowly moving forward, but the frustrating thing is, I could have completed a lot more by now. After this weekend I’m really going to put my head down and charge through it.

The weekend – We’re going to go see a family that is really close to my family. Spur of the moment thing, other end of the country. Sadly this is quite likely to be the last time we get to see the wife/mum of the family until Heaven due to the rapid progression of the cancer she’s dealing with. Would be pretty sweet if you could pray for her and her family 🙂

Kidney stones = bad times. The war still rages on with the little freaks.

Did you hear …about the Morgans? – We went to see it at the cinema… was alright. Wouldn’t rave about it.

The family – Doing good. New Year I think was a little harder than Christmas for Mum and Dad. But nevertheless everyone partied into 2010 in style… I went to bed at 10pm haha. Essay writing was calling my name. I’ve had such wicked New Year’s the past 4 years in America, Denmark, and England; and with sooooo many friends…. and this year I was like, “Ah, nah, I’m gonna take a break from it.” It felt great to have a quiet one!

My Man – Fitz is doing good. Busy enjoying and making the most of his last 2 weeks on the ship. Less than 4 weeks til I see him! These past 13 weeks have flown by in some ways! CRAZY!

Goals for the New Year – I always wonder why New Year is such a significant time to set goals… people say it’s a good time to start afresh.. but as a Christian you get that opportunity to start again every second of every day. If only our thinking wasn’t so narrow-minded and we stopped listening to the lies of the World and Satan! Maybe our walk with God would make so much more progress! I didn’t set any goals. I just wanna see how things turn out in some areas of my life 🙂 What journey am I going to walk this year? Am I ready for it?